Doubtful Dating Diva LOL I would like to see her reaction - just reading it here made me laugh out loud

Realizer There was a time when I was a kid on spring break and I had my arm around a girl. She didn't seem to touch me back and I didn't think she liked me. I said something about it and in a lovely tone she said, "Did you notice I'm not pushing your arm away? " That's kind of what her last communication felt like. She didn't really ask about the orgasmic meditation, but she was very present, very engaged, and that's ultimately what's sexy.

StealthSeductress My interpretation of your date is this....Girl and Guy have strong sexual chemistry. Girl felt Guy's intention to get in her pants. Girl plays hard to get with her words, but told Guy she wanted him with her body. Guy knows she really wants to have sex but wont out of fear of being a one night stand. Guy keeps trying. Girl got offended. Guy feels bad and says what Girl wants to hear, hoping she might reconsider sex. Girl goes home confused. Guy goes home with Blue Balls. Once you realize it's just a game, then you can be a player. On a deeper level, so you got an older version of the young douche bags you've been dated? No It really isn't the guys age, or that all guys want sex. It is how you project yourself. It is those deep self thoughts that you are more that sex, but you don't really believe it. Make a list of your great lady qualities and say that is what guys want you for. I guess, if I am blunt...you objectify yourself. All of this talk about this guy being older and still wanting a one night stand just like the guys your age. My guess is you are sending out some signal in your actions and words....A signal something like..."I am afraid guys only want me for sex." Or something fear related. Just remember, you set your value.

Dreamerella I posted an update just for you. :)

StealthSeductress Connecting with an ex crush is like opening a Forrest Gumps's box of chocolates...You never know what you are going to get. First look within yourself. Why would you travel to see this man? How long have you been single? Have you healed from your marriage? Now the GUY, If he wanted a real relationship, he would have come to see you. Here is my rule based on experience...never travel more than 60 miles. And really I thinking of modifying this rule to never travel at all. Second, if you had sex with him when you went to see him, this really sealed the deal as in, shut the door to a serious relationship. I mean, you see him online after how many years, fly out to see him (at your expense?) then are surprised that he doesn't respond? Well, he probably is thinking A) she comes to visit me after how many years...desperate B) She is recently divorced with two kids....She probably just wants to have a new daddy for her kids and maybe that thought terrified him. C) If you had sex, He probably is thinking....She is easy and desperate and she does this with every guy. Now the long distance factor....with all these variables why would he want to get involved with someone who seems to have a self worth issue, I mean if it were so eager to see him, a now stranger, who knows how many other men you have hanging at home, so maybe he cannot trust you. A weekend fling is a fantasy scenario. If I was you, and I've been you, think of just letting that tie go. Your feelings after a divorce are raw and hurt. Maybe take some me time and evaluate yourself because this visit seems as a symptom of loneliness. Plus, he was part of a by-gone era, the pre-mommy wife phase and you may have just been chasing a shadow, we cannot catch a shadow. Move on and don't worry about this guy. The way I see it, this is a great learning opportunity and you can vest your energies into yourself. If you change the view as to one of learning and loving yourself in the midst of rejection, stop the self talk of what "I" did wrong. Say, I put myself out there. I am making the first steps into my new life as a single mom. Give yourself time to heal and be the best you. Good luck!

Jon W. I like this story. I think it sounds like a person who has passion, courage, and wants real experiences. I like the person in this story. Might I try and change the dynamic? Nothing went wrong, everything went right. You reconnected with a man you had a crush on for the longest time, flew out to his city to see him, spent an amazing weekend together and (I assume) had hot amazing sex. So why are you feeling desperate, unfulfilled and upset? You need to expand the way you view and experience men, sex and relationships. I thing there is a sort of ego issue here, in that if a man doesn't follow up a sexual encounter with offers and desires to invest in your life, you've been disrespected and used and now this person somehow thinks less of you. That's just social conditioning and that negative voice in your head that your mom gave you. Go back to this story, and rewrite it like its a sexy fun awesome fantasy that any woman (or man) would drool over. Then say to yourself 'I did that and it was awesome'. If you feel bold, share the experience with the man on Facebook, take a deep breath and get back to living your fun life. And next time you feel that desire for some fun exciting times with a man, you'll be more ready for it. Ciao

CMpianist Just move on completely. It may be hard for you now but eventually you'll soon forget about her. Let time heal your wounds.