Default-avatar-193x196
+ Add contact
Relationship Status:
It's Complicated
1 Posts

tennpass’s relationship with We'll call him J

Best thing that ever happened to me.

Together for two years, met his family and he met mine, no problems. It was a blue moon if we argued, and when we did it was handled in an adult manner. We both wanted the same things in life and wanted to do the same things, and didn't want the same things. Moved in together for six months, thought everything was happy, and that's when it crumbled to BFF's with benefits. Truly we're still Best Friends to a T, can talk about anything and do anything, but he said he didn't want a 24/7 relationship. Cons: He runs from commitment (or so I think), he is stubborn, messy, flirts with women when drunk, and has a tendency to say one thing and do another. Pros: Listens, is Honest, is Loyal (when not raging drunk), is here for me, argues honestly in an adult manner, Trusts me, can talk about everything and anything, likes me for me, wants everything that I want and wants to do everything that I want, great sex, and is super handsome.

  • We were set up

    Delete
    Cancel

    We were set up

    Edit

  • We met

    Delete
    Cancel

    We met

    Edit

  • We became friends

    Cancel

    We became friends

    Edit

  • First date

    Delete
    Cancel

    First date

    Edit

  • First kiss

    Delete
    Cancel

    First kiss

    Edit

  • First sex

    Delete
    Cancel

    First sex

    Edit

  • Became exclusive

    Delete
    Cancel

    Became exclusive

    Edit

  • Met their friends

    Delete
    Cancel

    Met their friends

    Edit

  • Met my friends

    Delete
    Cancel

    Met my friends

    Edit

  • Met their family

    Delete
    Cancel

    Met their family

    Edit

  • Met my family

    Delete
    Cancel

    Met my family

    Edit

  • I am in love

    Delete
    Cancel

    I am in love

    Edit

  • I said "I love you"

    Delete
    Cancel

    I said "I love you"

    Edit

  • They said "I love you"

    Cancel

    They said "I love you"

    Edit

  • Moved in together

    Delete
    Cancel

    Moved in together

    Edit

  • We're engaged

    Cancel

    We're engaged

    Edit

  • We're married

    Cancel

    We're married

    Edit

  • First child

    Cancel

    First child

    Edit

  • Broke up

    Delete
    Cancel

    Broke up

    Edit
  • 14 Events
  • 5 Followers

What's great about We'll call him J

  • We'll call him J has similar dietary habits

    The same

  • We'll call him J has similar political views

    The same

  • We have a great connection

    Our connection is unreal..

  • We have great chemistry

    SUCH great chemistry

  • We'll call him J is realistic

    Doesn't keep his head in the clouds too much
View all 68 great things

What's not so great about We'll call him J

  • His online profile doesnﾒt match reality

    He said he wanted the kids, long term, etc. and then two years later bam he runs away ...

  • We'll call him J is too focused on work

    While his job DOES require him to work 7 days a week and sometimes 12-20 hours in a da...

  • We'll call him J is too untidy

    He is.. a little..... messy to say the least

  • We'll call him J doesn't know what he wants out...

    Wants things, but doesn't make the effort to make them happen.

  • We'll call him J is too independent

    I think part of him cannot be committed like he wants to because of fear and habit, an...
View all 7 not so great things

tennpass added a negative impression

29 December 2012

Doesn't make as much effort as I do

Seems to have become too comfortable in our relationship

Online profile doesnﾒt match reality

He said he wanted the kids, long term, etc. and then two years later bam he runs away from commitment. We can have kids together but he doesn't know how to commit with anything else.

Doesn't know what he wants out of life

Wants things, but doesn't make the effort to make them happen.

Doesn't make me feel like a priority

I do feel like his seven day work week comes before me.. sometimes his friends as well depending on who it is.

Too independent

I think part of him cannot be committed like he wants to because of fear and habit, and yet he can but he's scared.

Too untidy

He is.. a little..... messy to say the least

Too focused on work

While his job DOES require him to work 7 days a week and sometimes 12-20 hours in a day.. I hate how it sometimes sucks the life out of our relationship until we have sex
Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added a positive impression

29 December 2012

Friendly

Never hostile

Great body

From his head to his feet... mmm.

Ambitious

Has big dreams and goals.

Clean

Physically cleanest man I've ever met.

Generous in bed

Loves to please me.

We have great chemistry

SUCH great chemistry

Caring

Always

Patient

So patient

Great taste in music

His music taste is in correlation to 90% of mine

Tolerant

He's very tolerant.. and patient

Attractive

I love everything about him.

You consider my needs

Listens when I say I need something.

Respectful

very

Realistic

Doesn't keep his head in the clouds too much

Likes pets

Loves dogs (like me)

Strong

I immensely loved this about him.

Generous

Will get me anything at a moment's notice without complaining

Honest

Never lies

Insightful

Offers deep conversation, thoughts, advice, and ideas.

Reliable

Always could count on him for anything

Gets along with my friends

They all thought we were 'that' couple.

Fashionable

Dresses in a way that fits him and his personality.

Educated

I like his eccentric college history.

Open-minded

Always listens to other opinions besides his own even if he's still stubborn

Our dietary habits are similar

The same

Kind

Never mean

Modest

His ego isn't as big as anyone else who if like him, would be. Another +1

Practical

Doesn't go crazy

Makes me feel at ease

We can talk about everything and anything without fear of judgement or anger.

Flexible

Will do anything for me if I ask

Shares my religion

We both believe in a higher power of the same deity.

Humble

Never is prideful or vain

Great sense of humor

Makes me laugh.. so hard

Is in a similar stage of life to me

While I'm a little younger, we both want the family and kids

My family likes you

Immensely..

Low maintenance

Doesn't bitch, or belittle me for not doing something a certain way.

Active

Does triathlons, works out daily.

Knowledgeable

Knows about many different things that isn't your every day knowledge.

Sensitive

Pays attention

Respects me

Never disrespected me.

Intelligent

Highly intelligent, doesn't act like he knows it.

Our political views are similar

The same

Pays for dinner when we go out

Complete gentleman.

Fun to be with

I love every minute he's around

Independent

Very independent then clingy as well

Affectionate

While he's not into major PDA, he is affectionate towards me in private.

Great in bed

AMAZING.

Easy-going

VERY easy-going which is SUCH a plus.

Wants kids

He does, and I still do

Shares my goals

We both want to do the same things and want the same things

Spontaneous

Can be very much

Shares my values

We both want the same thing.

Thoughtful

Always asks..

Hard-working

Never gives his second best, it's always his first.

Focused

He's focused on one thing, and one things only at a time.

I see a future with them

I seen the kids, future trips, future..

Considerate

Always.

Shares my passion for sport

We can both work out together at our own paces and not feel bothered or guilty

Great kisser

Knew how to make my toes curl.

Mature

As mature as someone his age can be.

Courteous

Opens doors, etc.

Trustworthy

Forgiving

Never holds a grudge

Giving

Loves to see me smile

Adventurous

Loves to travel, try new things, etc.

Great connection

Our connection is unreal..

Respects my independence

Never complains or whines when I do something for me on my time

Avoids unnecessary conflict

Both him and I share this 600%
Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass posted

29 December 2012

Perfect Relationship, gone.. BFF's with benefits.

Images?q=tbn:and9gcq9yi9rablr1yy0mgtjgnwfnz0sykgxq6s9mvxtlibk8ymxfcdagw Here we go. J and I were together for two years, lived together for six months and that's where things went slightly down hill. We never did argue, and if we did it was handled in an honest and genuine adult manner (no abuse here), we made each other laugh, we were opposites then not so opposite (he's a shy jock/triathlete, I'm a athletic tattooed nerd) with many things in common. A year and some change into the relationship we moved to another state together, proceeded to take a month apart. During that month, I worked at my new job full time six days a week, and he worked off... Read more...
tennpass asked:

Does this mean maybe we'll do better together living apart vs some couples who live together for awhile?

3 votes
Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
1 Comment
  • Default-avatar-75x75

    Mscherry I think you let him get away with a lot. Moving to another state together is a joint decision, and instead ended up breaking you two apart should have bonded you two closer. He may be depressed and sounds confused. You sound pretty easy going and don't seem to bring up the petty problems... you've done what you can an now the ball is in his court. Maybe he needs to get professional help. You sound like you know what you want, he doesn't.

tennpass added an event

15 December 2012
Brokeup

Broke up

Well.. more like downgrade to Friends with Benefits

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added an event

16 June 2012
Isaidiloveyou

I said "I love you"

It was during an argument actually.. and I told him and he just stopped and didn't know what to do because someone could love him even if he did something hurtful

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added an event

10 June 2012
Movedin

Moved in together

It was good

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added an event

01 September 2011
Inlove

I am in love

I just knew.

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added an event

06 July 2011
Metmyfamily

Met my family

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added an event

04 July 2011
Metmyfriends

Met my friends

They loved him..

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

tennpass added an event

02 July 2011
Mettheirfriends

Met their friends

Default-avatar-75x75

By: tennpass  Relationship: We'll call him J

5 Followers
0 Comments

Relationship

X
?
You can pick whatever nickname you like for the relationship
?
The relationship in one sentence
?
Describe the relationship. Just write whatever you want about it.
Close
Save

Relationship

X
?
You can pick whatever nickname you like for the relationship
?
The relationship in one sentence
?
Describe the relationship. Just write whatever you want about it.
Delete
Close
Save

What's great about We'll call him J

X

Enter a keyword or find by category

Search for a reason...
Or select a category that describes best what you like about him or your relationship

Select a reason from the list below to describe how you feel

Add your own custom text...
Add to Response

Selected Reasons:

OK

What's not so great about We'll call him J

X

Enter a keyword or find by category

Search for a reason...
Or select a category that describes best what bothered you about him or your relationship

Select a reason from the list below to describe how you feel

Add your own custom text...
Add to Response

Selected Reasons:

OK

What's great about We'll call him J

X

  • We'll call him J has similar dietary habits

    The same

  • We'll call him J has similar political views

    The same

  • We have a great connection

    Our connection is unreal..

  • We have great chemistry

    SUCH great chemistry

  • We'll call him J is realistic

    Doesn't keep his head in the clouds too much

  • We'll call him J is kind

    Never mean

  • We'll call him J is open-minded

    Always listens to other opinions besides his own even if he's still stubborn

  • We'll call him J is friendly

    Never hostile

  • We'll call him J is patient

    So patient

  • We'll call him J is honest

    Never lies

  • We'll call him J is forgiving

    Never holds a grudge

  • We'll call him J is caring

    Always

  • We'll call him J is courteous

    Opens doors, etc.

  • We'll call him J is sensitive

    Pays attention

  • We'll call him J is practical

    Doesn't go crazy

  • We'll call him J is thoughtful

    Always asks..

  • We'll call him J is trustworthy

  • We'll call him J is reliable

    Always could count on him for anything

  • We'll call him J avoids unnecessary conflict

    Both him and I share this 600%

  • We'll call him J is low maintenance

    Doesn't bitch, or belittle me for not doing something a certain way.

  • We'll call him J respects my independence

    Never complains or whines when I do something for me on my time

  • We'll call him J is humble

    Never is prideful or vain

  • We'll call him J is easy-going

    VERY easy-going which is SUCH a plus.

  • We'll call him J is independent

    Very independent then clingy as well

  • We'll call him J is giving

    Loves to see me smile

  • We'll call him J is generous

    Will get me anything at a moment's notice without complaining

  • We'll call him J is fun to be with

    I love every minute he's around

  • We'll call him J is flexible

    Will do anything for me if I ask

  • We'll call him J is affectionate

    While he's not into major PDA, he is affectionate towards me in private.

  • We'll call him J is tolerant

    He's very tolerant.. and patient

  • We'll call him J is spontaneous

    Can be very much

  • We'll call him J is respectful

    very

  • We'll call him J shares my passion for sport

    We can both work out together at our own paces and not feel bothered or guilty

  • We'll call him J likes pets

    Loves dogs (like me)

  • We'll call him J wants kids

    He does, and I still do

  • We'll call him J is in a similar stage of life to me

    While I'm a little younger, we both want the family and kids

  • We'll call him J shares my goals

    We both want to do the same things and want the same things

  • We'll call him J shares the same values as me

    We both want the same thing.

  • We'll call him J shares my religion

    We both believe in a higher power of the same deity.

  • We'll call him J has great taste in music

    His music taste is in correlation to 90% of mine

  • We'll call him J has a great sense of humor

    Makes me laugh.. so hard

  • We'll call him J is modest

    His ego isn't as big as anyone else who if like him, would be. Another +1

  • We'll call him J is mature

    As mature as someone his age can be.

  • We'll call him J is knowledgeable

    Knows about many different things that isn't your every day knowledge.

  • We'll call him J is intelligent

    Highly intelligent, doesn't act like he knows it.

  • We'll call him J is insightful

    Offers deep conversation, thoughts, advice, and ideas.

  • We'll call him J is focused

    He's focused on one thing, and one things only at a time.

  • We'll call him J is hard-working

    Never gives his second best, it's always his first.

  • We'll call him J is strong

    I immensely loved this about him.

  • We'll call him J is educated

    I like his eccentric college history.

  • We'll call him J is fashionable

    Dresses in a way that fits him and his personality.

  • We'll call him J is ambitious

    Has big dreams and goals.

  • We'll call him J is clean

    Physically cleanest man I've ever met.

  • We'll call him J is active

    Does triathlons, works out daily.

  • We'll call him J is adventurous

    Loves to travel, try new things, etc.

  • I see a future with him

    I seen the kids, future trips, future..

  • We'll call him J gets along with my friends

    They all thought we were 'that' couple.

  • We'll call him J is liked by my family

    Immensely..

  • We'll call him J respects me

    Never disrespected me.

  • We'll call him J pays for dinner when we go out

    Complete gentleman.

  • We'll call him J considers my needs

    Listens when I say I need something.

  • We'll call him J is considerate

    Always.

  • I feel at ease around him

    We can talk about everything and anything without fear of judgement or anger.

  • We'll call him J has a great body

    From his head to his feet... mmm.

  • We'll call him J is generous in bed

    Loves to please me.

  • We'll call him J is attractive

    I love everything about him.

  • We'll call him J is a great kisser

    Knew how to make my toes curl.

  • We'll call him J is great in bed

    AMAZING.

What's not so great about We'll call him J

X

  • His online profile doesnﾒt match reality

    He said he wanted the kids, long term, etc. and then two years later bam he runs away from commitment. We can have kids together but he doesn't know how to commit with anything else.

  • We'll call him J is too focused on work

    While his job DOES require him to work 7 days a week and sometimes 12-20 hours in a day.. I hate how it sometimes sucks the life out of our relationship until we have sex

  • We'll call him J is too untidy

    He is.. a little..... messy to say the least

  • We'll call him J doesn't know what he wants out of life

    Wants things, but doesn't make the effort to make them happen.

  • We'll call him J is too independent

    I think part of him cannot be committed like he wants to because of fear and habit, and yet he can but he's scared.

  • We'll call him J doesn't make much effort with me

    Seems to have become too comfortable in our relationship

  • I don't feel like I'm a priority to him

    I do feel like his seven day work week comes before me.. sometimes his friends as well depending on who it is.
Ajax-loader

Just started seeing someone?
In a long term relationship?

By sharing what’s going on in your relationship, our community will be able to follow along and give you guidance.

Share Your Relationship SHARE YOUR
RELATIONSHIP
CHECK OUT THESE EXAMPLES:

Got insights about dating or relationships?
Got an interesting story to tell?

We’d love to hear about it! Your story can help others!

Share Your Thought SHARE YOUR
THOUGHTS
CHECK OUT THESE EXAMPLES:

Got a dating dilemma?
Not sure how to proceed?

Let us help you with our input and advice.

Pose a Question POSE A QUESTION
CHECK OUT THESE EXAMPLES: