What does "trying" mean? Jeans, flats, and hoodies are pretty common fare in this oh-so casual town. The women of the city look cute, they say, but not HOT. "What does it mean to look hot?", I asked. Craig jumped in, "It's the high heels and cute dresses. And get your hair done once in a while. Put on a little makeup. I'm a man, just give me a little cleavage to show me you care. Come on!" He was understandably passionate as he's a man who's been around the dating circuit for some time.
Okay. I get it; men like attractive women and the reverse also applies. What about what's between the ears? I asked Hasher, "Aren't you in love with your wife's sparkling wit? Her personality?", which made Hasher look a little sheepish. Craig offered a save: it's irrelevant. He says, for most men the first two dates are about finding out if you're attractive enough for intimacy.
They assume you're never going to look as good as you do today. If you're not going to try today, they make the logical leap that you're not going to take care of yourself in ten years time.
San Francisco - unlike its big city counterparts like New York or Washington DC - has a very high male to female ratio. Women are complacent because there are lots of well educated men with great prospects. They may not always be Mr. Right but there's another guy to take the last guy's place. Women in San Francisco, they say, are COMPLACENT.
Comments
hmmmm... @Oblivia I really liked that post and it gets a girl thinking. I think this issue is also common in marriages. I'm divorced now and I've learned from that debacle that these men might be right if a women feels secure in knowing she will deffinitly have that man then she tends to put in less effort. But, honestly I think once you have that man you have to work harder to keep things fresh ya know?
Hey Rissa Bee! Do you mean that if a woman tends to put in the effort for a guy that's "worth it"?
Yes, but I think it should be both ways because men let themselves go to once they think they've got you(you know not bothering to use just for men any more ahem rough rider) and of course you have to feel their worth it
Aha! I see - you're right about that guys are THE WORST culprits for taking care of themselves, especially after the deal is sealed. And at least Rough Rider gets to look "distinguished" even without Just For Men. The day when gray hair on women is going to seem hot can't come soon enough for me. :P
Oblivia ha ha ha I love that distinguished! I think dame judy Dench pulls of the gray hair fabulously :-)
Good point! I agree and disagree. I agree that women in San Francisco tent to pick a more relaxed look than, let's say, women in LA. In part, because anyone that tries to walk the North Beach hills on high heels will most likely want to jump off golden gate bridge right after. Also, there is nothing more frustrating than getting one's hair done only to walk outside and be hit by the horizontal rain that San Francisco likes to sport. At the same time, I think it is important to "doll it up" from time to time. Men are visual, that is undeniable. So, knowing that, we can definitely use it to our advantage when we find a guys that is "worth it".
I Agree with every word!
haha "Dollying up" on certain big occassians is a definite must. However during casual days, it's attractive for women to show off their femininity with more flattering clothes. And it's not always necessary to show off skin to look like sexy. Sexiness is also about personality and confidence (huge deal) since looks can only keep someone's attention for so long
this is such b.s....first of all, there are more than 2-1 STRAIGHT women to men in this town; so really, it isn't about what women are or aren't doing...it's about men never having to settle for one, because there is another one or three right around the corner. SF is a haven for playboys, and I have met almost all of them.
It's hard to characterize sf women. First off, most are not local but from somewhere else. The city's odd lifestyle draws an odd crowd and many make their own conventions rather than following society at large. There are different themes of people in this town; hipster women, yuppies, foreigners, thirty somethings. Some try harder than others. Plus there are a lot of asian women too. The women definitely are cuter in silicon valley, though there are fewer of them. I think the guy was being a bit of an ass but people instinctively reply negatively when asked about the opposite sex. Especially when they're looking.